The past couple of years I marinated in the thick goo of self-indulgence. The sauce of convenient indecision gradually displaced my passion for writing and its creative juices in my spirit with the sap of laziness, expediency and task-based tunnel vision.
Maybe all writers have to muddle through that at one time or another. Some may do it periodically. I do not know about them and how they handled it. I do know that it filled my life with a void.
After the last 24 months, I can say this for wading through a writer's funk - its easier to go to school when you know what you are supposed to be learning. The murky writer's noir hid my empty cup of creativity and half-baked bread of industry.
I have two projects that my spirit wanted to develop. The first project centers on prayer support for mission groups. That is a noble goal and it received good marks from various individuals who were close to the process. The main problem was that I was willing to write about it, but not do it.
Can you spell hypocrite? (Well, ... I guess you can now.)
It never seemed to be a problem in my little self-serving world to have a character do something in my imagination that was too time consuming for me to do.
The difference between a vision and a dream is the vision is something you will see happen. A dream is good. You can even gather all the materials for it, but you will never see it realized.
David had a vision that Goliath would fall. He had a dream for the construction of the temple.
My writing has lived as a dream. I created several decent pieces that should be submitted to someone. However, since I wrote out of self-fulfilment, I couldn't bring myself to let another say "Yep" or "Nope."
I am completing the Bible study "Write His Answer" by Marlene Bagnull. Before I completed five paragraphs I knew the marinade that wrapped my slumber would never flavor my work. What I looked for to encourage and spark creativity was nothing more than the sludge of life. It smothered any undernourished life managing to survive.
A believer's creativity comes from our source of life. Our words flow from The Word. We are flavored by the salt of His tears.
I am relieved to know that writing has not abandoned me, even if I neglected to properly nourish it.
My projects are slowly coming to life as I engage them from His perspective. I know that whether I build the castle or ride with the saddle tramp, my Lord has promised he will instruct, teach, counsel and watch over me. (Ps 32:8)
A writer can't ask more from a mentor than that.
